I’ll start this off by saying that if you’re unaware of the rather strange looking word at the beginning of the title of this article, click here for a full explanation of this Croatian phenomenon. This is a phenomenon which invisibly protects all those employed by the state and other bodies, in Zagreb and beyond, regardless of what they do, or indeed don’t do, as the case usually is.
The cult of the uhljeb is a fascinating one, and should you be accepted into it, you’ll earn a very decent monthly wage for doing very little. Fear of being fired if you don’t do a good job? That’s long gone. The need to be productive and professional? Who needs that?
If you’re still not quite following the rules of the cult of the uhljeb, Index provides not only a detailed saga, but an image of an uhljeb in his natural habitat – sleeping at work, while your extortionate taxes pay for it.
As Index writes on the 24th of September, 2019, for some time now, a photo of one of the bosses who has been asleep in his office has been circulating among Zagreb’s utility officers.
Igor Sesar’s allocation of duties covers the areas of Donji grad (Lower town), Črnomerec and Podsljeme in Zagreb, and he has taken to the very nice custom of locking both of the doors of his office, resting his head down on his desk and sleeping. According to his colleagues, Sesar spends several hours a day in such an uncomfortable position. That position can’t be good for his back! Poor Igor.
Despite his conscious attempts to hide his new custom of having long naps at work, it seems that his cognitive abilities have largely been preserved, so, when he learned that his colleagues had photographed him, he decided to protect his privacy and peace of mind. His bedroo… sorry, I mean his office, has a skylight, so Sesar glued about twenty sheets of A4 paper over the light to prevent new ”attacks” on his siesta, and with that he killed two birds with one stone, as this gave him a more practical type of light, less harsh on the eyes, and more appropriate to sleep with.
“When he’s not sleeping in the office, he can be seen in the cafe at the station (Zapadni kolodvor),” the utility worker told Index, giving them a photo of Sesar asleep. He also explained how all of this has been going on, as Sesar couldn’t answer any calls, and his office door was locked. They were becoming concerned for Igor, and decided to have a look into his office, they were greeted with the sight of a sleeping Igor.
The secretary thinks there is no boss there!
Index tried to reach Igor Sesar for three days – on Friday, Monday and Tuesday. After listening for hours to the official telephone that the callers were the first in the queue and the conversation was being recorded, the secretary finally made contact on Monday.
”I don’t think the boss is here,” she told Index. Despite that, they still managed to get to him on Tuesday and it seemed like he had been asleep since about 11:00. Namely, he didn’t seem to know where he was employed – let alone what type of position he held. The confused (and sleepy) Sesar seems to think he works at [Zagreb] Holding!
“Contact [Zagreb] Holding for information,” stated Igor Sesar, employed by a company which isn’t even part of Zagreb Holding. However, Index insisted that he comment on the photo of him sleeping in the office, assuring him that it had nothing to do with Holding.
“I’m not even going to comment on that nonsense,” Sesar said abruptly. Index hasn’t received any comments from the powers that be, namely Mladen Vidmar, who sent a written inquiry about his employees’ work habits. By the way, the salary of communal workers in Zagreb is around 7,000 kuna. Their bosses, including Igor Sesar, understandably receive more. Sleeping is very hard work and thus deserves a fatter wedge of cash each month, no?
Those in the know say that the salary of the head of the department is between 10,000 and 11,000 kuna per month. So, remember that when you pay every utility bill, fine, or when you pass a pile of stinking, uncollected rubbish in Zagreb, and think of our dear Igor and his pleasant dreams with his head on his desk.
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